March 9, 2012
Spring is Here?
"Spring is here, the flowers are all blooming,
outside there's a quite refreshing air.
Spring is here, the bunnies are all bouncing,
happy people, laughing, playing, EVERYWHERE."
His delusions about my power and influence are quite the ego rush, eh? *smile*
Spring Break is a mixed bag of things, like the party today being moved indoors because of grey dismal cold rain, and more importanly, like the impending arrival of da Sister, who da Creature idolizes, and who will be here for exactly 10 days straight, and then will leave again and go back to college.
Sometimes I wonder if I'll survive his sorrow at losing her. It would have been so much easier to make a clean break, have her only come home in the summers, but she would have been miserable (and so would I) and frankly, SO WOULD HE. Yet, still, we cycle through this weekly... "YAYAYAYAY!! da Sister is home!!!!!" followed 48 hours later by "MAD SAD STOMP POUT REBEL REFUSE TO BE REASONABLE because da Sister has gone back to da College".
It is like today...there is the promise of fun, bright, breezy, happy, golden play in the sun, but instead you wake up and it's grey and drizzmal, and sad because you didn't get what you wanted.
He'll never see what I see. He'll never forgive life for being such a disappointment sometimes. How do I help him not see each experience as a unit measure of his happiness, but as part of a continuum of things? How will I ever get him to decompartmentalize his emotions and NOT freak out (happy or sad) at every life moment? How can I help him ride the waves? I don't know yet.
All I know for sure on this rainy day is that I am glad it's Spring Break and I am glad she's coming home, and I am grateful that we get the 10 days.
at 8:22 AM